Finding Happiness.

Well I have a new job, hopefully soon I will be all caught up with my bills. What a relief that will be. I will finally be able to get a new laptop soon as well, and a new bed, and an ipod as well. Oh the many joys of realising money will soon no longer be a huge stress. Rent, and utilities, and food will finally be easy thing to pay for, and I'll have money for the rest of my bills, and be able to save up for things I want, and trips, and actually be able to just have savings set aside for possible rainy days. I feel so much better now.

Finally get to see a surgeon for my gallstones as well, my consultation is on the 8th of this month, so on Thursday, then I will finally have a surgery date, oh happy days, it seems as though all things are coming together, so much to be thankful for at the moment.

On a slightly less happy note however, my boyfriend is sick with a bad chest infection and with only 12 days left until his five week Korea trip, I am finding it hard that I can't be spending this time with him, however the important thing is that he gets plenty of rest and gets rid of this chest infection. Hopefully soon he will be feeling himself again, leave my boyfriend alone infection. Haha!

I have been seriously thinking over the idea of finding a Scottie I can adopt/buy as I do really want one, but not sure what I will be doing there quite yet. I was looking today but it seems nearly impossible to find Scottie's in the area I am living in at the moment, so in any case I will have to wait. 

I have also decided that the trip I am going to take will be in Ireland, and England. Mainly I'll be stopping over in England so I can visit with my friends and catch up, also I do love my England, and missing it terribly. But I would also love to visit a Country I have never been to and since Ireland is so close to England, and I have always wanted to go, I shall!

That's it for now, be back another day.

Little Speck of Light in the Gray.

Well it's official I will be getting surgery. Two months of waiting, and I decided to just book an appointment with my doctor. Yesterday I went and saw him, and told him I still hadn't had the follow up with the internal specialist to then be referred to a surgeon, and that my gallstones were still a big issue. Thankfully that led to me getting to see the internal specialist today, who has finally referred me to a surgeon, he said I should be expecting a call from them soon to book an appointment, but that my appointment may not be until September, hey at least I am one step closer, so at the moment no complaints from me. 

I spent a big portion of my day job applying, and mulling over career choices. I am going to keep on trying to get a receptionist job, or something of the like, and hopefully soon will be able to go back to school. This morning I was leaning towards taking an ECE (Early Childhood Education) course, and becoming a preschool teacher, or did I want to take a Travel & Tourism course so I could be a Travel Agent and get those sick deals on flights? 

The more and more I thought about working, and being happy the more I realized I need to try and see if I can't develop my hobbies/likes into actual careers. Do I plan on diving in head first? no. I think I'll just start off by dipping my toes in the water. So the two hobbies I chose are photography, and writing. Of course I plan on still working full time whilst developing these skills further, and seeing where they can take me. 

I am hoping to get a few photo sessions in August for Back to School to start myself off there, but we shall see. As far as writing is concerned I would like to take a Creative Writing course to help me with developing and becoming comfortable, and confident with my writing abilities. I have thousands of stories running about in my mind, and I would love to be able to share some of them. 

I think that about covers my update for the last while, but I shall be back soon. 

Choices.

Well Amber is officially back in Ontario. I miss her so much already and it hasn't even been 24 hours yet. I guess it’s just going to be an adjustment. It will take time to get used to not having her here anymore. That being said I am sure she is happy to be home and with her family again, which is all that matters, and hey, it’s not like I will never get to see her again.

In other news, it turns out all is okay with my liver, just waiting on my consultation with the surgeon now, still no date for that, waiting sucks, but at least I am slightly closer to a surgery date.

I very clearly did not get the job at the bank, which is a shame I think it would have been a brilliant job, but all I can do is keep on trying. Here’s to hoping I find a full time job that pays a decent wage soon.

I hope to be able to take my GED exam at some point this year, and I am currently trying to figure out what career path I want to take. What job do I want to do forever? So far, no jobs have ever intrigued me enough for me to be like, “Hey I want that to be my life long job.” but let us hope that I will find a career path that I am willing to take soon. It’s time for this 24 year old to be a more responsible, financially stable, mature (ok well that’ll never happen) adult.

Harder.

I feel defeated. Trying to keep a happy, positive attitude seems to be getting more and more difficult for me lately, and I've become far more emotional then I care to be. It just feels like my life was finally heading in the right direction, I felt I had everything sorted out, and I knew where I wanted things to go, and then as usual something happened that’s making everything fall apart. Aside from my job only being part time and not paying a decent enough wage for me to actually live off of, I suddenly find myself needing to find new living arrangements for August. I can understand why this is happening, and am in no way angry with others, but at the same time I feel like crap. When is my life ever actually going to be okay for more then a few months? I’m not expecting life to be a walk in the park, but I would like for once to just be able to sit and relax on a bench and enjoy the view for a longer period of time. I have been trying so hard to stay positive and not let the stress of it all consume me, but the past few days I've been an emotional wreck, and it just isn't fair for those around me. I am sure that in time everything will have a way of sorting it’s self out, it always does in the end. I just hope that it’s sooner rather than later. 

Waiting.

Still no news from the doctor yet, I will hopefully hear back from him soon. I am dying for my results so I can finally have my consultation with a surgeon, so that I can get my surgery date, and then finally my surgery. It feels an odd thing to actually be looking forward to, but I honestly cannot wait until I finally get the surgery. Gallstones suck. 

On another note I did an online video interview to work at a bank today, so fingers crossed that I will make it to the next level of their interviewing process, as that job would help out my financial situation immensely. Send me all the good luck vibes you can, it would be muchly appreciated.

I also have a severe case of the traveling blues, and really want to be able to start saving up so that I can go on a holiday somewhere. I am dying to just get away. I do really want to head back to the UK so I can see all of my friends over there, but at the same time would love to go somewhere I have never been yet. Must also commence operation renew passport, so that I can actually leave the Country. 

I think that's all for now, shall be back with another update soon. 

Throw a Stone.

Its been quite a while since my last blog post, pardon the delay. Blogging is something I definitely want to get into more, especially given so much is going on in my life lately...okay well maybe not too much but I feel I definitely have lots of things to be blogging about.


Some of you may remember reading a few blogs about my first ever break-up that have since then been removed. On a romantic note, I am in a relationship with my "ex" who is now officially my boyfriend its been a little over a month now, and things are going quite well in that department. 

I am not sure if you're all aware of the fact that I have gallstones. If you're not entirely sure what gallstones are, then let me fill you in a little. It's not anything like kidney stones, and the only true way to "cure" or get rid of gallstone attacks is by getting surgery to remove your gallbladder. Your gallbladder is what helps break down fatty-acids etc, for your stomach. It is not a necessary organ, but definitely a helpful one WHEN doing its job properly. Very painful however when you're unfortunate enough to have gallstones. If you care for any further information feel free to follow this link: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gallstone which has me feeling terrified.

I am very impatiently awaiting for some blood test results for my liver, as my liver enzymes are/were quite high and they want to ensure its because of my gallstones, and not because of something more serious like Heptatis, Celiac Disease, etc. I shall hopefully be hearing back from the internal specialist within a week, about these results, then if all is good (fingers crossed) I can finally have a consultation with a surgeon, and then the real waiting for my surgery day begins. 

The thought that it may very well take until next year to get my surgery has me feeling completely, totally, and utterly, frustrated. I have been having quite a few issues with my gallstones the past few months, although I have been trying to keep a very close eye to what I am eating. That being said since I carry on having issues, and the last 3 days have been miserable, I am putting myself on a very strict gallbladder diet, which I am not looking forward to in the least, so here is to hoping that I will be getting my surgery sooner than I feel I will be. 

Things I have already cut out of my diet are peanut butter, and cheese, however I am now cutting out ALL dairy, and will be living off of, fruit, vegetables, rice, and liquid forms of food, like broths, and soups (non creamy soups of course), I will also be trying to have a smoothie a day as a meal replacement, which I will be making with soy milk (I have checked up on that and it is ok with gallstones), berries, a banana, and a bit of juice.

If going out somewhere for dinner I will ensure that whatever I order is very gallstone friendly, which limits the place I can eat out at, but that is sadly how things MUST go until my surgery as I really don't want to live in pain anymore.

That is all for today, will be back with an update soon.

February.

Hey Guys, 

It's been quite a while since I last wrote a blog, I cannot believe how quiet I have been especially with everything that has happened in the past month.

I am obviously in my new place living with Hayley and Stacey and that is going quite well. Money is a bit tight for me but I wasn't really expecting it not to be, so it's okay. We will soon be joined by a fourth roommate for a while. My friend Amber is moving down from Ontario, and will be living with us for a few months. This has me very excited!!

I have strangely had a month filled with dating fiasco's and heartbreak. That's a completely brand new world to me. Not sure what to make of it, but a big part of me feels like it's really not worth all the fuss, and that being single might just be a whole lot simpler, and less painful. However that being said, I know that I don't want to be single. I want a relationship, I want to fall in love, and I want a future with someone.

I have been trying to go to the gym regularly, and have recently decided to go five days a week. Today was meant to be my fourth day in a row but I am feeling very lazy, and run down, and therefor am giving myself this day of rest, tomorrow morning I will get up and go to the gym for an hour of strength before work, and then Saturday I'll go for my fifth day which will be cardio.

I am hoping to be able to purchase a few more sessions with Rily soon, coz although I am able to do the strength days on my own, I find it difficult to be as motivated without my trainer.

I think that is all that I have to say for today, but I will hopefully be back soon!
Byeee :)